Board games like chess, Monopoly and Life teach a multitude of things to a family who plays together. What about card games like Go Fish and War? Remember those? We don't have to wait for a rainy day or summer camp to play these games with each other. Checkers and Crazy Eights teach sorting and logic skills, fairness, rules, and most of all gives us a way to socialize in an organized fashion. Games give us a chance to show our strengths. They also give us the opportunity to show compassion for younger children or those less skilled. Games give every member of the family a chance to participate in something TOGETHER.

Holidays can be a source of friction for family get- togethers. Try to find a game everyone can enjoy playing together this 4th of July. Asking the stepkids for ideas would be a good place to start. Enduring their music for a half hour as long as they endure the parents music for an equal time. Making favorite foods from BOTH sides of the family will certainly be an easy way into all of their hearts. Have them teach you how to make their favorites if you don't know how--or look it up on the internet!

Although this isn't a traditional Independance Day activity, it could get started then and finished during the rest of the summer: build something together. My stepdad and I built a dollhouse together when he and my Mom first married. He was good at that kind of thing and I was happy to work on a dollhouse that I would then have and be able to play with! My Mom and I went to pick out different swatches of wallpaper for the different rooms, but other than that it was a stepdad/daughter project. We designed the layout of the rooms together, I held the wood while he sawed, drilled, nailed, glued. I helped measure and fit carpet, decided whether I wanted arched doorways or square. It was not only a million lessons in building, planning, painting, wallpapering; but also a very solid bonding that happened at the same time. The expected outcome was a beautiful dollhouse that I played with for years to come.

The unexpected outcome was a stepdaughter that dropped the stepdad's name and felt very comfortable calling him Dad!